"You are a mirror Reflecting a noble face. This Universe is not Outside of you. Look inside yourself; Everything you want, You are already That." -Rumi
Our life is our mirror, and the stories we tell about our life say a lot about our inner climate.
Most of us walk around projecting outwardly, onto our screen of life, what we feel about ourselves on the inside. Regardless of how others are behaving towards us, we quite literally will translate their behaviors through our own operating system and mirror.
What does this mean?
Our life is our mirror. Our mirror about how we feel about ourselves, our world view, what we believe we deserve, and so on.
In my work with mothers and families, I help them set themselves up to receive help in the postpartum window. Key phrase “I help them to set themselves up to receive”. They must be WILLING and feel WORTHY of receiving. Often, what I have witnessed, is mothers especially not wanting to ask for the help, not wanting to burden anyone as they would say. And thus, they cut themselves off from the help because they do not feel worthy of it. I illustrate to them the value in a nurtured mama, a full cup overfloweth. Everyone gets that mentally, but we must open ourselves up to to receive the help, and again that means feeling worthy of it.
How about manifestation? The Law of Attraction. Saying affirmations? Any of you try any of these methods? You can say mantras, affirmations, and optimistic phrases until you’re blue in the face-but if you do not feel you are worthy of what you are trying to bring into your life, you will not. Moreover, if you do not believe it is possible, how could you even see the doorways opening to bring it to you?
We quite literally see in our mirror of our life, what we feel about ourselves, what we feel we are worthy of. It really is a brain twister if you look back on events say ten years ago from the eyes of who you are now. In most cases, you are able to see them a bit differently yes? The perspective shifts with us. Often times, a transformation is a perspective shift away. Or even better, a moving from mind into heart, into our true Self which transcends all of this noise.
Relationships. The hardest flipping arena to learn in, in my experience. Relationships are, in my eyes, the most powerful mirror of all. The most tender and vulnerable.
"Relationship is a mirror in which we see ourselves not as we wish to be, but as we are. " -Jiddu Krishnamurti
How many of you have felt rejected? That you, your self, as a being, are bad, wrong, unlikeable because someone does not choose you the way you want to be chosen?
Choose your Self.
The person who you feel is rejecting you, is not rejecting you if you do not reject yourself. If you are attached to an outcome, then what is being rejected is your attachment to what you feel ‘should’ happen. An outcome. If you recognize you are whole as you are, surely your self is not being rejected in your experience. If you are attached to an outcome, and said person does not help produce that outcome, your outcome that you are attached to, is being rejected. If we look back on times when things did not align for us, where we felt ‘rejected’ often times If we are being honest with ourselves, we can see it’s a redirect in a more aligned direction. If we do not try to control so hard, perhaps we would see things are moving in a more honest, aligned way. We must let go to see this.
Perceived rejection is a reflection into what we have not chosen in ourselves. What we need others to affirm. To choose.
Oh look! They chose me, I must be worthy! This is a real experience. I have had clients, who have picked unavailable people just so they could have the journey of feeling chosen by them, once they won their attention. They wanted to be chosen. We must choose ourselves!
Another client once told me that she was afraid of getting into relationships because she would lose herself. My answer to her was this. Find yourself first, rely on your self the best you can, and then you won't get so lost in the other. Easier said than done, but absolutely possible with conscious application.
If you feel rejected, ask yourself, are you rejecting yourself? What are you asking others to choose in you? To validate?
Do you feel disrespected? Do you respect yourself?
Do you feel you do not have a voice in a situation? Do you give yourself a voice?
Do you not feel heard? Do you listen to yourself?
These are simple inquiries that can help you to explore your mirrors. Look at your hot spots, your triggers. Then look some more. How are you giving those outside of you the power to define your worth? What illusory holes in you, are you looking for them to fill?
A spiritual practice, something I talk about in my blog about commitment, can anchor you into your Divine Nature. The true Self. The Source of life. This is our aligned connection. If we make life about what is happening TO us. OUTSIDE of us, then we will of course be rocked around like a ship out at sea. However, if we anchor into our true Self, the abiding Divine nature within us all, the sea will rock about, but we will be anchored in truth. This takes developing a relationship with that connection-however that looks for you-it does not matter the way, that is a personal relationship. It must be cultivated, remembered, and aligned with in your daily life. It is possible, and it is our true Source. Until then, you will Source from the outside, which is rife with disappointments because it is not what is true.
Life is not all roses and butterflies all the time, challenges most certainly arise, but it’s all in how we respond to them. Are you the captain of your ship anchored in your knowing, or are you waiting to see what the waves might do? This life is yours to craft.
Look deeply into your own self, and reflect upon how your life is mirroring you. Where can you change the script? What holes in you can you fill within yourself rather than looking outward?
This is not always the easiest experience, nor is it glamorous, but it is rich, and full, and true.
If you would love support in exploring your life, as your mirror, check out my offerings, I’m here to help you trust and Source your Innate Knowing.